Welcome to Texas, Adrian...

And we at the Rangers look forward to that one year you have when this contract expires that you will actually put up MVP caliber numbers and get your THIRD huge contract.

OK, that's not totally fair. Adrian Beltre will probably fare well in a hitters ballpark and will play well for the Rangers. But am I the only one who thinks they could have used that money to keep Vlad Guerrero, keep Michael Young at third instead of moving him AGAIN, and sign Rafael Soriano to solidify the bullpen and move Neftali Feliz to the rotation?

The problem in Texas never seems to be "not enough offense."
Granted, he will bring a great glove to Arlington and he was terrific for Boston his one year in Fenway.

But there is also the Carl Pavano effect.
Pavano has had two very good years in 13 seasons and will parlay that into over $70 million when it is all said and done.

Beltre? He too has had two elite seasons in 13 years.
He will parlay that into over $180 million when this latest contract is up.

Better swing a good bat, Adrian.
You can get a third big deal if you time it right.

File this under HOLY CRAP! Cliff Lee goes back to the Phillies

OK, who saw THIS coming?

Seriously... when I heard the Phillies were wandering in the mix for Cliff Lee I thought "They are still trying to make up for sticking Lee in the Roy Halladay trade. They are at least showing their fans that they knew they screwed that up."

It seemed like it was for show.
And I had asked Phillies fans to let their team off the hook for dealing Lee.

But obviously they weren't REALLY in the hunt.
We all read the articles. It was clear. It was either going to the Yankees for the big money or going to Texas to live a peaceful life, pay less taxes and murder deer.

It was like waiting for a new Pope. Black smoke meant Yankees. White smoke meant Rangers.

And napalm means EVERYONE ON THE PLANET EARTH WAS WRONG!

A night after the Dexter season finale disappointed with no big twist, Lee supplied one that has given shockwaves throughout baseball.


THE PHILLIES... they want to be the big bad monster of the National League and be included in the sentence with the Yankees and Red Sox as big ticket destinations.

Well it sure looks like they are that now. With a rotation of Roy Halladay, Cliff Lee, Cole Hamels and Roy Oswalt... is 110 wins out of the question? Plus they can deal Blanton for relief help or a veteran outfielder.

And you don't have to wonder if he can handle it. He WANTS to be there.

It is World Series or bust in Philadelphia.



THE YANKEES... There are two gigantic slaps in the face to the Yankees in this signing.

First of all it destroys the idea that the Yankees can sign anyone they want. The whole "Just get him... he'll take our money" didn't fly with Cliff Lee. And why not? I don't think it had to do with anyone spitting on his wife. He's going to Philadelphia where they VOMIT on each other in the stands.

It is the idea that if you want a sure fire chance at a ring, you are better off going to Philadelphia and NOT New York. Seriously which team is more likely to make it to series now? Clearly Philadelphia. Their #4 starter would be an ace for a contender.

And now the Yankees have to pick up the pieces. Their off season has been NOT subtracting while the Red Sox have been adding. After Sabathia, who do you trust in the rotation? Hughes? Is Petitte even coming back? Ivan Nova? Is Ed Figueroa around?

Dare I say it? Carl Pavano? He's available.



THE RANGERS... Well, Cliff Lee's role in Rangers history will be that of a mercenary. A spectacular cameo but a cameo nonetheless. You can't blame the Rangers. They went all in to get him... finally got the World Series and bent over backwards to retain him.

Ironically it was the Rangers willingness to sign him that allowed Lee to not automatically take the Yankees money and gave the Phillies time to get into the chase.

The Rangers still have a ton of young talent and could win the West. Look for them to target Zack Greinke and offer him the same Cliff Lee money.

(I thought Lee resigning with the Rangers would be the last scene of my Clint Eastwood movie.)


THE RED SOX... The fabulous off season in Boston just got a little bit better. With Lester and Buchholz, the Sox have a solid 1-2 punch in their rotation. They just need either Beckett, Lackey or Dice-K to rebound. And oh yeah, they need Papelbon to pitch for a new contract.

The lineup is set provided Youk is back and they have some depth. And unlike the Yankees they actually IMPROVED in the off season.

With the Rays dismantled and the Yankees pitching uncertain after Sabathia, the Red Sox MUST be the favorites now!


THE GIANTS... the World Champions are still giddy over winning it all and with the Padres dismantling, the Dodgers a mess, the Rockies questionable and the Diamonbacks in transition, they remain the team to beat in the West.

If Jonathan Sanchez gets his act together and Madison Bumgarner pitches the whole season, they could have the SECOND best 1-2-3-4 rotation in baseball. And prepare for a rematch in the NLCS.

Of course you realize this means War! (Not W.A.R.)



THE BRAVES...They should be on full "Let's go for the Wild Card" mode. They have good pitching and some great young talent. And picking up Dan Uggla was a big move and Jason Heyward is the real deal. But any hope that the mighty Phillies were going to take a big step backwards this year just was flushed down the toilet.

Having Lowe, Hanson, Hudson and Jurrjens might not be as sexy as what they have in Philadelphia, but it could lead to a 95 win season and an October ticket.



THE MARLINS... Like the Braves, they have a rotation that can best be described as "Diet Phillies." Josh Johnson is a top pitcher. Anibal Sanchez and Ricky Nolasco are solid. Javier Vasquez should fit in well in Miami.

Plus if Chris Volstad, Alex Sanabia or Jhan Marin develop they'll be five deep. And there's some talent in the line up. But with the Phillies entering "Yankee/Red Sox land" the Marlins shouldn't even be paying attention to them. They are Wild Card hunters in 2011 and hoping for more when they move into their new part in a few years.


THE NATIONALS... they are not a good team. At ALL. They are a 90 loss team that will probably have another losing season next year.

But God Bless them for pretending that they are just a few pieces away from being a winner. They overpaid for Jayson Werth and put themselves in the Cliff Lee sweepstakes. Now look for them to make a big push for Greinke.

Washington fans, you can't complain that your front office isn't TRYING, even though if EVERYTHING goes well in 2011 they will probably finish no higher than third.


THE METS... For Mets fans, tonight was the ultimate "I have good news and bad news" scenario. The good news? Cliff Lee isn't going to the Yankees. Take THAT arrogant Yankee fans.

The bad news? It is only going to get worse for the Mets and the Phillies are only going to get stronger.

If the Mets get off to a bad start in 2011, they have to consider dealing Johan Santana. A bad start could mean falling too far behind the Braves and Marlins in the Wild Card hunt and a meaningless season. The new brass can't be seduced by the "New York" in their name. They need to be realistic, something that was NOT Omar Minaya's strength.



So there you have it. One decision and suddenly all of baseball is turned sideways.
Man, do I have to wait this long to have it be more than "in theory"?

LET'S PLAY BALL ALREADY!

Cliff Lee... one the best post season pitchers ever? Not so sure about that.

The Cliff Lee sweepstakes keeps on rolling and I hear commentators and writers talk about how he is an All Time great post season pitcher.

Now I am not going to belittle his post season record but let's calm down for a little bit.

First of all, if I turned back the back the world a la Superman all the way back to 2008, Cliff Lee's career post season numbers would look like this:

0 Games.

So he went to 0 games to the second coming of Sandy Koufax in two years?

Now going into the 2010 World Series, his post season stats were indeed eye popping.
He was 7-0 with a 1.25 ERA in 8 career post season starts with the Phillies and Rangers.

He averaged more than 8 innings a start, throwing 3 complete games (and it could have been 5 complete games except he was lifted for a mop up man in both the 2009 NLCS and 2009 ALCS.)

So yes, he was outstanding.

Then came Game 1 of the 2010 World Series where he was more impressive as a hitter then a pitcher.

Look, any great pitcher can lose a pitchers duel. Even Bob Gibson lost a game 7 (mainly because Curt Flood tripped in a puddle.)

But here's the hand the Rangers dealt Lee in Game 1:

They were playing in a pitchers ballpark against a notoriously weak offense and they took an early 2 run lead off of Tim Lincecum, who couldn't make it out of the 6th and let up 4 runs.

Cliff Lee should win that game 101 times out of 100, not give up 6 earned runs in less than 5 innings to a bunch of banjo hitters.

And not to be harsh, but he lost again in the elimination Game 5. He didn't pitch badly, but he DID let up a 3 run homer to 80 year old Edgar Renteria while Lincecum was all but flawless.

His numbers for the World Series were ugly. REAL ugly.
It doesn't diminish what he did before, but it should put a damper on the hyperbole of where he ranks all time.

Lee's 2 years were damn good, save for the 2010 World Series... but he's no Dave Stewart. He's no Curt Schilling. He's no John Smoltz.

If he won that first game in San Francisco, chances are the Rangers would win the Series... and the whole "He just wants to win a ring" element of the negotiations would be off the table.

And as I pointed out in my OTHER post that references Superman, there are some red flags about his health and age that make me think that 7 years for him might be excessive.

But hey, he'll be paid as an All Time Great and if he leads either the Rangers or the Yankees to a World Series title than nobody will remember those 2 games in 2010.

Another Cliff Lee thought

Each day Cliff Lee doesn't sign, it seems like the Rangers, the Yankees and probably some other team add more money to the offer.

Each week that goes by it seems like another year is thrown onto the contract.

What if Cliff Lee waited until just before spring training?

Get the teams all sweating.

He could have a 15 year contract for $375 million.

Hey, it's worth a shot!

If all things were equal, Cliff Lee should be a Cardinal

Wherever Cliff Lee will sign, it will be for the biggest contract. And why not? Would YOU turn down the most dough?

And after being a Cy Young winner in 2008, he has played for four different teams. So why shouldn't he go for stability in his life now?

And of course the Yankees are front runners.
The Rangers want him back and supposedly there are some other clubs in the running.

If it weren't a money and budget factor, wouldn't he fit perfectly with the St. Louis Cardinals?

He doesn't want to go to New York!
He is a low key guy who just wants to pitch.

His wife doesn't want to go to New York. She thinks they are all spitting scum bags.

And pitching in the Texas heat for 6 or 7 years will wear him down.

In St. Louis, the nice Arkansas boy will have a passionate Midwestern fan base cheering for him.
He'd be under the tutelage of Dave Duncan, the best pitching coach in the game.

And oh yeah, the Cardinals rotation would go "Lee - Wainwright - Carpenter - Jaime Garcia - Jake Westbrook."

Um... hello pennants!

It would be like when Greg Maddux joined an already stacked Atlanta pitching staff in 1993.

Plug Lee into the Cardinals staff and they would be a terror in any short series.

Plus he would get all of those games against the Astros, Pirates and Cubs which is always good for the win/loss totals.

All things are NOT equal and the Cardinals aren't even in the sweepstakes for Lee.

But they should be. It would best for ALL parties.

Will Cliff Lee's free agency be like the end of Superman 2?

There's a great scene in Superman 2 that I will spoil here.
If you haven't seen the movie... it came out nearly 30 years ago. Take your time.

In the scene, the evil Kryptonians led by General Zod have been obsessing over one thing: Capturing and defeating Superman.

And when they cornered him in the Fortress of Solitude, Superman was forced to go into that chamber that takes all of his powers away. When he was in there, Lois Lane was crying, Zod and his two lackies were smiling knowing that they were about to win.

And Lex Luthor, brilliantly played by Gene Hackman, was looking around puzzled. There was something odd happening and he was the only person who noticed (being the smartest character in the movie.)

When Superman came out of the chamber, Zod thought he had won. But actually Superman had reversed the process and all the evil Kryptonians were powerless and Superman crushed General Zod's hand in a moment that made a 10 year old Sully jump up and start cheering and STILL gives this 38 year old Sully goose bumps.

So why the hell am I going over that scene?
Beyond the fact that it is awesome... it kind of reminds me of the Yankees pursuit of Cliff Lee.

The Yankees have been obsessing over Lee since the 2009 World Series when he handed them their only 2 losses. And then this year, it looked like the Yankees were going to pry him loose from the Mariners... only to be outfoxed by the Rangers and have it haunt them in the ALCS when Texas and Lee man handled them for the pennant.

(Jesus Montero, the prospect the Yankees wouldn't part with to get Lee, had better turn out to be good!)

But now in the open market, it is assumed he will leave Texas for New York. Even Nolan Ryan thinks so.

So in this scenario, Cliff Lee is Superman and the Yankees are of course Zod.

Superman is about to kneel and swear his loyalty to Zod and the Yankees.

Lois Lane, crying, would be the Rangers... and frankly the rest of baseball seeing the Yankees get what they want.

In this one?
I'M Lex Luthor looking around, noticing something is wrong.

First of all, if the Yankees are looking to give Lee a seven year deal like they gave Lee's former teammate C. C. Sabathia... that is assuming he will be a premium pitcher in his late 30s.

That's not always a safe bet. Cy Young candidates can break down in an awful hurry. Don't believe me?

Take a look at the top 5 Cy Young finishers for 2007: Jake Peavy, Brandon Webb, Brad Penny, Aaron Harang and Carlos Zambrano.

3 years later you could get all five for a six pack of Sprite.

And before you think I am being just a gloomy glass is half empty guy, remember that at at age 31, he was having back issues.

His numbers in Texas were good but hardly the stellar stats he was piling up on a dreadful Seattle team.

Remember his stretch in mid August when he was getting clobbered?

Do things like "bad backs" tend to get better with age? If he was with the Yankees, he would probably turn to Andy Pettite and ask "Hey, when your back was messed up in your 30s, what did you use?"

And Pettite would reply "Sorry man, they test for that stuff now."

Imagine if injuries catch up with him like those 2007 Cy Young candidates. Isn't a bad back a red flag?

And of course there is the New York factor.
He needs to come up bigger than Clark Kent's alter ego in order to justify a huge contract.

Now Sabathia came up bigger than his waist size when he arrived in 2009. He won the ALCS MVP and looks like he'll be an ace stud for years to come.

He's been the exception.

It's easy to think of Kevin Brown as being the hot head, hand breaking bust blowing Game 7 of the 2004 ALCS.

But remember when the Yankees acquired him, he was a stud who was coming off a solid year with the Dodgers and was going to take Roger Clemens spot in the rotation. I still can hear Charlie Steiner describing him as "a warrior."

Think his heroics in the 1997 NLCS and 1998 post season earned him any good will in New York?

How do you think Cliff Lee's Game 1 World Series clubbing this year would have gone over in New York?

How did A. J. Burnett fare? He won the GIGANTIC Game 2 of the 2009 World Series... and that bought him good will for almost 45 minutes.

And if Cliff Lee might not be a fit in New York, there's the question of New York not being the right fit for Cliff Lee.

Sometimes those warning signs of a guy not wanting to play in the big spotlight are not unfounded.

How did Randy Johnson, one of the best pitchers of the last quarter century, do in New York? He was miserable before he threw his first pitch.

Even the great Johan Santana has lost some of his luster since arriving in Queens.

And then there is the bizarre contract circus that's going on in New York.

With Prince Hank sounding off and the team playing the contract haggling with Mariano Rivera and Derek Jeter in public, the once stable Yankee organization is slowly looking more and more like the old Bronx Zoo... remember the one where they kept signing big players and couldn't make the playoffs.

And I know this is sacrilege to say, but if things don't go well in the free agent season are the Yankees as big a lock to win a World Series as they used to be?

A team where Rivera isn't there... or only signed for a year?
A team where the veterans are tied up to huge unmovable contracts as they are rewarded for past seasons (when they ALSO made big bucks)?

And remember, this team is getting older and their young players aren't exactly challenging the veterans for playing time.

If their young players were any good, they would have been able to TRADE for Lee in the regular season.

So yeah, Cliff Lee is Superman this off season... but there is ample Kryptonite out there.

The Yankees might very well end up with a crushed hand.

And before any gives me grief for comparing the Yankees to evil General Zod, remember that in this scenario, I'M Lex Luthor!

Now enjoy the awesome scene by clicking here.

MY WIFE DEFEATS A FISH!!!!

As I wrote before, my wife and my fish both predicted a Giants and Rangers World Series.

My wife knows a little more than my fish, and yesterday she proved it once and for all.

Wifey picked the Giants to win it.
Red the fish picked the Rangers.

And I've never seen my wife more proud than when she reigned supreme over a fish.

I can make fun of wifey half watching the games and my fish swimming around... but my picks sucked.

I bow to the superior baseball intellects.

Color me impressed, Rangers fans

Soak it in Rangers fans.
It's called passion for baseball. It's a long season... it's not 16 Sundays. It's every day and investing time emotion and having moments of great joy and winters of agony.

And if your team wins, you are overwhelmed with joy that can make each summer after wards a celebration.

Enjoy it. This frustration will pay off.

I started the post season needling Rangers fans but from the response on the blog and in the stands of Arlington, you are out there and you care.

I'm impressed.
Fill that park up next year. Don't be like the Tampa fans who need to be bribed to show up to the game.

Wear those AL Champ T shirts. Make those antler signs.
And oh yeah... DEMAND that they sign Cliff Lee!

Jonathan Sanchez should start today... and here's why

The Giants should take Sanchez's sorry arm out of the ice pack and throw him today... against Cliff Lee.

And I am kind of serious.

Right now they have Lincecum going up against Lee. It could be a wash. Two awesome aces, neither had their best game in Game 1.

And Lee knows that a win tonight could help him get that $100 million contract in the off season.

So I am basically going back to the logic I used in the Yankee series regarding A. J. Burnett.

If you need a start from Jonathan Sanchez, have him throw three innings tonight... Romo throws 2, Casilla throws 1, Mota throws 1, Ramirez throws 1 and Affeldt throws 1. Each of those pitchers is rested.

And if the Giants lose, they have an off day to rest the arms and have Lincecum throwing Game 6 and Cain Game 7 at home against Wilson and Lewis. Advantage Giants in both games.

I guess what I am saying is, if you HAVE to throw Sanchez, do it when you have two games (and two aces) to spare.

It's not going to happen. But it's worth saying it NOW instead of a second guess.

I told the Rangers to start Cliff Lee

As I wrote on Thursday, this is not a second guess. Cliff Lee should have started Game 4. He didn't go 5 innings in Game 1 and this could have been a series changing game.

Yes I know Madison Bumgarner pitched brilliantly, but who is to say he would have pitched as well knowing how little margin for error he would have with Lee pitching for the other team.

Maybe Lee goes more than 4 innings and Ogando isn't pressed into multiple inning duty and doesn't get himself hurt.

Maybe the Rangers build on the momentum of the game 3 win.

Instead Lee, in what could be his last ever Rangers start, having to save the season for a day and then hope the Rangers could cobble together enough good innings to hold off Matt Cain in Game 6 just to force a Game 7 showdown.

The Rangers traded for a unique weapon and didn't use him when they needed him.

It may have cost them the World Series.

I told them so.

What did YOU do at age 21?

When I was 21 I was finishing up my junior year at NYU, eating too much Chinese food, renting movies at Kim's Video on Bleecker street and sharing a tiny apartment with a guy whose name escapes me right now.

When Madison Bumgarner was 21, he pitched 8 shutout innings in the World Series on the road against an amazing offensive team to put the Giants to within one game of their first World Series title since moving to California.

I am going to make a judgment call and say Madison's 21st year was better than mine.

Can YOU top Madison?

Hope you Giants fans who wanted an exciting series are happy

You've got a series now... you've got drama and tension and a Game 3 starter named Sanchez who looks rattled.

My father described it best. "He sh*t on the floor and p*ssed on the furniture."

So I don't want to hear from any Giant fan friends that they want more drama. As if this season and the entire existence of the San Francisco Giants was the equivalent of General Zod bellowing "Is there no one here to even challenge me?"

The World Series is spilling into November... and the Giants can still win the whole thing with a win from Linecum and a win from Cain.

Fox should be happy. Rangers fans should be happy.
Giants fans... just root for big blowout wins.

And oh yeah, no more 2 out walks to Bengie Molina.

The Texas Rangers - A film by Clint Eastwood

The Texas Rangers story this season has unfolded like a movie... but not just any kind of movie.

Specifically it has been a Clint Eastwood film.
I'm not talking about the Spaghetti Westerns, the Dirty Harry films or even the Clyde the Orangutan movies.

I'm talking about the respected Clint Eastwood films of the 1990s and 2000s.
You know, the ones he churns out about once every 8 months. The ones where, even if you didn't like them, you'd think, "Well, at least it was well made."

Bear with me, but the story of the 2010 Texas Rangers would be an ideal film for Clint not only to produce and direct but also to star in.

It is a story like Unforgiven or Million Dollar Baby where Clint is the grizzled old timer brought in to do what he was born to do... and paired up with a partner his age and a young whipper snapper.

Think about it!
You have Nolan Ryan leaving his ranch to save the Rangers.
You have Ron Washington and Josh Hamilton overcoming their drug past.
You have a Rangers team that is filled with cast offs from other teams giving each other antler signs.

And they beat the Yankees! It seems that every baseball movie, with the exception of Pride of the Yankees and The Scout, has the Yankees as the bad guys. Even the Bad News Bears had the evil little league team called the Yankees.

It adds juice to seeing them win the pennant at the end.

Rent your tuxedo for the Oscars, Clint... the movie is tailor made. The script would practically be a Mad Lib.

And let this blog post be one of two things:

1) My pitch, in case anyone at Clint's Malpaso Productions reads my blog.

or

2) A way for people to see I predicted this movie before they even rolled cameras.


The film stars...

CLINT EASTWOOD as NOLAN RYAN

Yeah, he doesn't look like Ryan (as Ryan has clearly discovered the Rawlings All American Grill). But Clint has Ryan's imposing presence. He's the legendary cowboy whose background makes everyone stand at attention. He's the old school hero who wants nothing to do with these crazy new ideas. You can imagine him responding to the concept of pitch counts with a quiet, "Say what?"

MORGAN FREEMAN as RON WASHINGTON

Sure he's older than the real Washington, but this is Hollywood. Stockard Channing played a teenager in Grease for Christ's sake! Besides he can play the instant respect card when he arrives in the dugout. And he can play the troubled side when his cocaine use comes out. Plus let's face it, he could narrate the hell out of the film. Give it the ole Shawshank Redemption - Million Dollar Baby treatment.

MATT DAMON as JOSH HAMILTON

Clint has used Matt in his last few films, and why not? He's awesome. He doesn't really look like Josh Hamilton, but who cares? He can play the many layers of Hamilton. Ryan will inevitably get Hamilton pumped up, reminding him not to throw away his gifts and chance to be a great player. The Rangers are his third team and best shot at redemption. And Clint is big on redemption. Plus, when Washington has the cocaine problem, it can be Hamilton, the young player, who reaches out and helps him. When he stands by his manager, it will bring a lump to the throat like Jimmy standing by Coach Dale in Hoosiers.

HILARY SWANK as CLIFF LEE

Let's face it. Hilary is dying for a third Oscar... and Clint loves her. She's already won an Academy Award playing a woman pretending to be a man. Why not push it all the way? She'll just play a guy! And just treat it as if it is normal. By the end people will be saying, "I completely forgot it was a woman playing Cliff Lee" and BAM! She'll have a third golden guy for her collection.

And there are the supporting roles.

ADAM ARKIN as CHUCK GREENBERG

He's the investor who lures Ryan out of retirement to save the team. He has to visit Ryan at his cattle ranch and no doubt steps his expensive shoes in some cow pies. He has to deliver the inevitable "We need you to come back" speech and tell him he can run the team HIS way. Then later in the film they'll cut to him a lot clapping.

JESSICA LANGE as RUTH RYAN

It's a shame Sondra Locke can't play this role, which will inevitably be thankless. Ruth, Nolan's wife, initially is skeptical about Ryan's going back to the Rangers. She realizes how it will be his last bit of youth sparked again and agrees. Then later in the film they'll cut to her a lot clapping.

GIOVANNI RIBISI as JON DANIELS
Ribisi would be spot on as the super young GM who works well (and shows respect) to Nolan Ryan. And along the way teaches Ryan that the young kids may have a few good ideas in their head. He looks concerned during a lot of the ball game scenes and gives Nolan Ryan someone to growl to.

NATHAN FILLION as C. J. WILSON

The left hander has a great season pitching the Nolan Ryan way... and let's face it. He looks like the star of Castle. And why would Fillion turn down a role in a Clint Eastwood film?

MICHAEL PENA as BENGIE MOLINA

The actor from Crash worked with Clint in Million Dollar Baby. He comes over to the team in mid season and gives the pitching staff a boost... plus when he hits for the cycle and later steals a base in the playoffs, it can be a comical moment.

RYAN KWANTEN as MICHAEL YOUNG

The Aussie does a nice job with an American accent on True Blood, and he's in shape enough to play the versatile Young in the film. Plus he's a nice looking man.

JAIMZ WOOLVETT as MIKE MADDUX

OK, he looks NOTHING like Mike Maddux. But damn it, Woolvett was GREAT as the Schofield Kid in Unforgiven and proved he could handle himself in a scene with the likes of Clint Eastwood and Morgan Freeman. He should be in the cast, damn it!

TIMOTHY BOTTOMS as GEORGE W. BUSH

The former owner of the Rangers who dabbled in politics will show up from time to time. No, you can't put Will Farrell in this movie. Besides, Bottoms played serious Bush in a 9/11 TV movie and silly Bush in "That's My Bush." He can handle the cameo.

So, come on! You can picture it! Even the poster can say

ACADEMY AWARD WINNER CLINT EASTWOOD

ACADEMY AWARD WINNER MATT DAMON

ACADEMY AWARD WINNER MORGAN FREEMAN

ACADEMY AWARD WINNER HILARY SWANK

ACADEMY AWARD WINNER JESSICA LANGE

IN A FILM BY CLINT EASTWOOD

(WHO HAS 3 MORE OSCARS NOT COUNTING THE FIRST ONE WE MENTIONED WHEN WE LISTED CLINT IN THE CAST!)

It smells like Oscar bait.

I demand a producer credit.